This guide is about lubricants – products containing friction-reducing substances that facilitate easier entry into body openings such as the anus, vagina or urethra. Alternative names are moisturizing gel or lubricating cream. The term "lubricant" is also often used in industry, but the content of my guide naturally only refers to physical use.
In my long career as a midwife and therapist, as well as in my sexuality, I have been able to gain experience with different types and a variety of products. Although the basic ingredients (water, oil or silicone) have remained the same for decades, the range of products on offer has multiplied, including the additives.
There are therefore a large number of different products that differ in their ingredients, areas of application and other parameters - and in their quality.
In this guide, I would like to explain the different types of lubricants and their properties and differences. This will give you effective help in choosing the right personal lubricant for you and your application.
Summary:
The domestic use of lubricants at home usually relates to the sexual context: during penetration, both vaginal and rectal/anal, for masturbatio and when using sex toys.
Lubricant is also required for other procedures that require the insertion of objects, e.g. the use of pelvic floor training aids, self-examination with a speculum, etc.
The use of lubricant is particularly important when moving objects are permanently in the vagina, anus or urethra, such as when using FMS dilators for self-treatment of dyspareunia such as vaginismus or lichen sclerosus , hemorrhoids , anal fissures , or for prostate massage and practical birth preparation.
Vaginal use is particularly necessary for women who have little lubrication of their own, for example during breastfeeding, in (post- )menopause or for other reasons.
Unfortunately, I find that some women are embarrassed to admit to using lubricants, as if it makes them feel inferior. The widespread idea that a sexually aroused woman is always wet and one who is not is simply not ready for sexual activity is not correct: there are defenitely women who tend to have a wet vagina without desire, on the other hand women can be very sexually aroused (almost) without lubrication.
There are water-, silicone- and oil-based products. There are also subgroups: flavoured ones, warming products and those that have a mild anaesthetic effect. They also differ in terms of their areas of application i.e. whether they are designed for vaginal, rectal or urethral use.
Water-based lubricants : They are particularly well tolerated and skin-friendly. They are also easy to wash off and do not leave stains in the wash. Important to know: Water-based lubricants are suitable for use with condoms, silicone sex toys and with our application sleeves, if these are required for use with Viball® medical love balls or Massive Balls (products for pelvic floor therapy and erotic use).
Silicone-based lubricants : Their main advantage is their long-lasting lubricity. They are compatible with latex condoms, but for condoms made of other materials, the manufacturer's instructions should be followed. Occasionally, silicone-based lubricants can cause skin irritation if you have sensitive skin or allergies. A major disadvantage: silicone is very stubborn and water-repellent - so it can only be removed from the skin with repeated washing. It leaves dark, oily stains on textiles, which are also difficult to remove.
Oil-based lubricants : Oil-based lubricants are usually more liquid, so the term "lubricant" is less appropriate here. Although they have a long-lasting effect, they still play a minor role in the overall range of products. This is probably because they are not so universally applicable:
Because they are mostly plant-based, they can irritate the skin or cause allergies. They also stain very intensely and - depending on the type of oil - are difficult to remove from textiles. In addition, oil-based lubricants cannot be used together with latex items or latex condoms, as they have a dissolving effect on latex.
The range of variants is very extensive. I provide an overview here:
Personal preferences and circumstances determine the selection here.
Lubricants are commonly used at home for vaginal, rectal, and urethral applications.
Vaginal application: Particular attention should be paid to good tolerance. Ingredients such as fragrances and flavours, preservatives and potential allergens should be avoided at all costs. To support the natural environment of the vaginal flora, it is advisable to pay attention to the pH value. When used vaginally, it should be slightly acidic, like the vagina itself (4.0 to 4.5). This reduces the risk of irritation, itching and inflammation.
Rectal use: Long, intensive lubrication is a particular advantage here. Oil-based lubricants can cause irritation, especially in the anal area. The pH value here should be neutral, i.e. around 7.0.
Application in the urethra: The urethra is a particularly sensitive area and prone to infections. Standard lubricants designed for vaginal or anal use are not suitable for this purpose. Instead, the products used must meet two essential criteria:
We recommend Instillagel®, as it meets both of these criteria exceptionally well.
If you're using it with sex toys, make sure it's compatible with the material—often silicone. Incompatible lubricants can damage the toy's surface and compromise its safety.
It is possible that you find lube unappealing, want to save money or have run out and are looking for a replacement in your household. There are numerous products in the average household that could be considered.
Basically, it can be said that caution is advised here. There is a risk that these substances can irritate the skin of the vagina and anal area and they can serve as a breeding ground for fungi and bacteria.
I would like to discuss the most commonly used ones here.
The use of various edible oils and fats such as rapeseed, sunflower, olive, massage and baby oil and coconut oil is particularly common as a lubricant substitute. Oils naturally have a different pH value than the mucous membranes. They can clog the pores and attack latex condoms, making them porous. The right pH value protects against the penetration of pathogens. Everyone has a certain amount of bacteria and Candida (yeast fungi) in the genital area. A disturbed pH value disrupts the balance of the flora and increases the risk of excessive growth of pathogens (see Fuchs, F. et al. (2017). "Impact of personal lubricants on the vaginal microbiota and mucosal integrity." Journal of Sexual Medicine, 14(7), 923-931). The result can be vaginosis, characterised by an intense fishy odour, genital fungal infections with itching, and various other conditions.
The same applies to the use of Vaseline as a lubricant. Here too, the risk of infections is increased and Vaseline also attacks condoms and makes them unsafe.
And what about common household products such as soap, shower gel, body lotion...?
And what about common household products like soap, shower gel or body lotion?
These are strongly discouraged. They usually have a pH level tailored to the outer layer of the skin and often contain additional substances such as perfumes and colourants.
In addition to your personal preferences regarding the features I listed above, I recommend considering the following aspects:
*Citric acid: Citric acid is contained in many lubricants and many people think of it solely as a preservative. It makes sense in lubricants as it combines several positive purposes. In addition to its undisputed ability to preserve through its anti-bacterial effect and the resulting longer shelf life, it stabilises the pH value. I have already described the importance of the slightly acidic vaginal environment. It is moisturising and its antioxidant effect ensures that the quality of the product remains consistent. In relation to our topic, this means that the desired consistency or viscosity is maintained. As always, it depends on the dose. Too much citric acid can cause skin irritation. I have already reported that I have tested many products myself and also paid attention to this aspect.
Once you have made your decision, please consider the following topics when applying:
I can only advise you not to be too frugal when making your choice. From experience, I can say that higher-priced products are usually of higher quality, are better tolerated and have a longer-lasting effect. They are often dermatologically tested and certified as medical products.
Above all, it is important that you are happy with your choice and that it meets all your needs!
Do you still have questions? Email me personally at hsw@theros.de, I'll be happy to answer them.
Hera Schulte Westenberg Midwife and therapist
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